frozen yet freed

all the things you said
runnin' through my head

mother, looking at me,
tell me, what do you see?

i am sitting at De Koffiehoek...
2 short essays
away
from
receiving
my
undergraduate
degree
from
college

i
am
frozen

frustrated

by

an unwillingness
from someone
who loves me as best as he knows how

to have this way
of being able to freeze me
in my path to freedom unnanounced

but wait

i am finding my feet again.

in a small apartment bedroom rearranged.

living with a sister who knows my deepest hurts
and pains
and struggles
and losses.

who can paint
it all into a portrait.

i have found my feet again

in this place

that i was once running away from

to find myself, to find God, to find Peace.

redemption has come in strange places, small spaces,
calling out the best of who i am in the worst of my own brokenness.

i have been called to know
a
love

that is stronger than my fears

and to
go
now

in
the
light

of my God

in
the
love

of my God

in
the
peace

of my God

in
the
joy

of my God.